Seeking Simplicity

A few days ago, as I sat in my motionless car waiting for traffic on the surprisingly congested, fog-shrouded back road to move so that I could get to work, I happened to glance to my right at the pond that stood beside the road.  The water was still in the cool morning air, a thin mist rising from it as the first shafts of the morning sun penetrated the branches of the surrounding pine trees.  A swan sat serenely swimming (say that five times fast), fluffing its feathers, oblivious to the world beyond its immediate surroundings.

As I gazed upon the swan, I found myself envious of the simplicity of the scene, struck anew by a desire to simplify my life.  I say "anew" because it's not the first time I've wished my life were simpler.  I also know that I'm not the first (nor will I be the last) to make that wish.  We live in frenetic -- nay, frenzied -- times, and it seems easier than ever to get caught up in the cycle of day-to-day responsibilities and activities, running from one thing to the next with barely a pause for breath.

I'm sure the litany of things that consume my time would be similar to that of many of my friends.  There's work (of course), gaming, theater rehearsals, family gatherings and events, outings with friends, two houses worth of yard work (the one we live in and the one we're trying to sell), doctor and dentist appointments, bills to pay, groceries to buy, books to read, shows to catch up on, etc. etc. etc.  Weeks and months pass in a whirlwind, and I periodically find myself taking an unexpected day off when I get sick because my body just can't keep up.  (But do I really rest on these days?  Of course not!  They are opportunities to catch up on reading...)

I'm not alone in the modern curse of overcommitment, and I realize that I did (and continue to do) this to myself.  I'm not complaining, though it may sound like I am.  I suppose I am observing, as I occasionally do, that the time has come to put on the brakes and simplify my life for a while.  The show I'm in is my fourth in a year with virtually no breaks between, so maybe it's time to take a month or two off from community theater.  Maybe I'll game a little less.  Maybe I'll stop pushing myself so hard at work.  I want to spend more time enjoying the burgeoning Spring and share more time with my wife.  For a while, I want to do less and be more.  I want to be more like the swan.

I know it won't last: too much relaxation makes me restless.  I've done this before, and I inevitably reach a point where I feel like a slacker for not having an overfull schedule.  The type-A overachiever in me would rather feel exhausted than feel lazy, so my fallow periods tend to be short and widely-spaced.  It won't be long before I'm ramping back up to the frenetic pace I'm accustomed to, but in the meantime, I think I'll take a few long walks, enjoy some sunshine and smell a few flowers.  It probably won't stick, but it'll be a pleasant change while it lasts.